October 15, 2013

Saucers Over Albuquerque

a farce in three acts


**

Assumed Redemption
(being the preface to act 1)

by James Carlson

Some men dream of Valhalla in the heart, a mounted beast they can hope to control only with the most bestial of acts and the celebrations of their remembrance.  Others create their own personal mythologies, preparing symbols for their diet and their daily routines, hoping to learn how to survive the worst of the world along the way.  Men of conscience, on the other hand, may find themselves walking briskly along a thin road to either conflict, dust rising into the future and hiding the path forward while masking the past.  Memories assume direction without reference.  As a result, only a desperate few will ever be worthy of the dreams their lives will eventually preface for the rest of the world.  They create a vicious disregard in their hearts and write out their own lives amidst the pages of a world unimagined.

These are the elements and conditions that map the origin of the stories and legends we try most urgently to remember in the darkness when a quiet, calm world sleeps and predators howl.  Even on strident courses set aside for us by anxiety and sorrow, the huge majority of men are only rarely significant outside of their own surroundings, while the twisted aggregates of their intent and its corruptions are even less so.  This is why we repeat the stories that we learn and the tales told of earnest men and great and worthy dreams.  We measure out in painful breaths the uncertain value of those enigmatic thoughts borne by such men and the pitiable personae we have sketched out and adopted to describe them as if they were ours alone and not merely the tasteless leavings of other men’s lives.  It is an expression of our arrogance to believe them original and to call them our own.  They are not.  They are merely a handful of scattered enigmas vying for our short-lived yet nonetheless starving attentions.

It is precisely because we are unoriginal and suggestible that we all too often owe our dreams and our dilemmas to the feckless men who follow behind those rare few worthy of our symptomatic regard.  This is, in fact, our worst quality, the most ungracious description of the human character.  We try so hard to live the dreams of other men that we forget how to create dreams of our own.  This cultural amnesia ultimately forces us to rely on unnatural and ultimately meaningless tales for the sustenance of heart our temporal lives demand, allowing them entrance into minds and emotions that represent the undefined legacy of our species.  Once there, they flop and scuttle before us like breathless fish at the bottom of a boat next to a couple of cracked sinkers and ugly, wretched bits of worm and cricket, and the milky scales of day-old snappers.  It is our suggestibility that makes them real, not some natural and inborn quality possessed by the measurable habitations of life.

The stories we absorb are just poor reflections of what were once the steps of an unknown dance that left only footprints behind, soon scattered in the wind, and yet, they nonetheless help us to navigate our culture and the development of our values if we can only hold firm and refuse to define them as some kind of modeled template of our lives.  Complacency is necessary, not sacrifice and belief, for only complacency allows us to focus our attentions on what we can do, not on what we can imagine.  One example of the need for such complacency is represented by the Disclosure issues currently being sold to dreamers and madmen by shameless reprobates throughout every nation in the world where the word “UFO” has come to mean something other than an undefined anomaly in the sky.  Disclosure is defined and reconditioned to meet the expectations of men and women who cannot possibly reach a consensus based on real knowledge of real events, and yet it is being used to shape political desires and potential national policy.  It is an arrogance that yields only to the imagination.

                                                                                                                               

Most of the world is aware that the Full Disclosure beggared by the irresponsible optimism of wishful thinkers to the ultimate fate of the universe has already revealed its most curious and penetrating secrets.  Nonetheless, we forever debate the social implications of aggressive incontinence, and fool ourselves into believing there might be something alien yet rational hidden away in decades-old government briefing memorandums just waiting at the bottom of some steel-layered safe at the Pentagon for that one properly worded query amidst a stack of the new FOIA requests for the week.  That’s why so many continue to send those relatively pointless requests out once a month like some religious responsibility, week after week, over and over again.  Each time a FOIA request finds its way to the post office, it’s wrapped up in expectations that the response will be different this time.  Maybe that single word in paragraph six that was changed at the last minute will find favor with another faceless Admin rep.  It’s certainly possible that there’s a new classified materials officer at Edwards AFB, and this guy just might interpret our intentions with a friendlier attitude than the last three appointees.  Maybe whoever he is will finally send us the records that we’re so obviously referring to instead of those damned garbage histories that keep talking about Venus waxing with the waning moon.  Maybe this time …

 

These are the easy lessons – things we’ve learned from experience and unchanging response.  We already know the color and the flavor of its debris, and we immediately recognize its true value.  You see, the flying saucer hunters are no longer primed with cameras and videos as they used to be, and this tells us something important about intent.  Maybe this new aspect of gathering wool has come about because they’ve finally caught up with Hollywood FX, and are still unable to prove the point or improve the outcome.  They used to tell us that in the future everyone will have a camera, and the proof of UFOs from outer space will become more apparent as a result.  Today, both corporations and governments assure us that the 24-7 video record of our environment is a necessary, albeit violent, investment of privacy calculated to improve the quality of our instantaneous and oppressive security, and yet nothing is clearer than the primary tenet of our new Church of the Saucer:  outside of criminal enterprise, there is nothing very interesting for us to examine.

We’ve finally cornered the future within the weeks and months of our lives and we have discovered that nothing has changed.  In typical response to this world weary principle, the predators now conduct their hunts in the pages of old newspapers and magazines and amongst the faded words of FOIA documents that are older than the USAF.  This too has repercussions, of course, easily discovered within the pages of a new dogma, and just as easily defined:  in the future there won’t be any more secrets.  According to what passes as the new wisdom, this ultimate truth will finally and for all time be readily apparent, as if all we had to do was convince some guy with the appropriate security access who happens to be more than a little annoyed with the IRS to speak up a bit louder into the hidden microphone and change world history with a whisper.  Pay no attention to the man in the closet, and never forget:  this revolution’s gonna be televised.

Every kid in the third grade demands his own You-tube account, while the old farts who know exactly how much the best kept secrets are really worth tell themselves in that shady bit of twilight that spins the world around just before new sleep dims old intent that they’d spill whatever the rest of the world thinks qualifies as the beans in a heartbeat for a small fistful of goddamn antacid that really works. 

Somewhere in Ohio, an eight-year-old kid playing with his sister’s spandex leggings is watching Alien Autopsy on his Dad’s DVD player and 60-inch flat screen and thinking to himself, this is so corny – I bet I could do it better on my laptop.  And he’s not lying, either.

Across the street, the battle-hardened trio who tried to get a neighborhood UFO Watch club started, but couldn’t generate enough interest to schedule regular meetings has decided to rest what’s left of their hopes on the supposition that their dreams were somewhere recorded and co-opted and will someday be brought out into the light.  For them, the truth can only be approached after it’s been talked about between midnight and four on nationwide talk radio or exhibited across the screen on what used to be the History Channel.  Meanwhile, educated men greet such presumptions with rigid contempt and a little sour laughter.

Unfortunately, the world has been forced to listen to this silly little tune for far too long, and none of it has ever really changed, forcing us to examine its evolution in the splendor of its stillness and its uncompromising refusal to grow into something worth the energy necessary to redirect our national gaze.  Take a deep breath.  Hold it.  Exhale.  Now, in this single moment, this aggressive second of future reckoning, reconcile yourself to everything that’s unremarkable in life and recognize therein the true face of UFOlogy:  it is worthy of attention only when it’s marketable with a profit margin exceeding the investment of reasonable and well-focused contempt.  There.  That’s your first lesson on how a toss-off theory of economics can dictate the value of anything – even your own worthless hallucinations.  If you’re starting to think that maybe your emotional investment in this odd little world of UFOs and flying saucers and alien abductions just off the highway of poisoned impressions and slaughtered cattle bleeding out into the hot, red brick clay of a cracked valley where the rivers dried up long ago might have been too time consuming in your youth to enable any real objectivity today capable of keeping your blood pressure consistent and low, then you should probably go grab yourself a nice, cold beer and some of those generic cheese puffs in the 50-pound bags, ‘cause you’ve got some serious catching up to do…

 

60-years of man’s complete and utter failure to wrestle the flying saucer out of its natural reverie of folk tales and myths into groundbreaking reality has forced the world to abide with a somewhat weaker intent to discover the rare and unknown than in centuries past.  In a way, this is fitting, since UFOlogy, in its most general and aggressive terms, has been relegated to the dreariness of a poor history lesson.  The most fanatical or heretical of its judgments are raised to interpret events that can no longer produce witnesses, because so very few have survived the intervening years.  That’s one reason it’s become so popular amongst the starry-eyed glitterati to embellish new UFO claims on old USAF history in order to create a reality that few critics are willing to apply their disgust to so evenly.  For 60-years they’ve been buying twenty different tales of Roswell being sold by con-artists with the gross mentality of incompetent thieves, and they respond by cursing the CIA, the USAF, and the rest of the Department of Defense for refusing to tell them what really happened.  Meanwhile, the CIA, the USAF, and the rest of the Department of Defense fail to respond with anything approaching the expected reconciliation of rumor, having dismissed those making such demands decades ago.  These are lessons children could understand, and yet the UFO proponents are still confused, blaming governments for their own stupidity made plain in their refusal to adopt one of the most popular and easily understood philosophies of human existence yet devised:  examine carefully before buying!

Claims invented in the library need no accompanied resplendence to amaze and bewilder – they just need another badly faked signature so you think it might represent actual history.  As a result, UFOlogy has been enclosed within the same theoretical structure as Jack the Ripper, leaving its adherents no closer to an answer than those who insistently ask the world aether for the Ripper’s true identity, while expecting, of course, no serious or cogent response.  It’s now very clear that the greatest and most violent discussions produced under the aegis of world-wide UFOlogy concern events and the interpretation of events that occurred decades in the past.  UFOlogy now encompasses ancient history, precisely because it cannot find relevance in current events.  When there is nothing new under the sun, what, exactly, is there left to discover?  Similar to the nearly extinct Martians in Roger Zelazny’s A Rose for Ecclesiastes, it appears that we can always learn a little something from ancient man’s contemplation of futility.  And not unlike the Old Testament’s Book of Ecclesiastes, the Second Law of Thermodynamics makes all things equal through time, while heat death cleanses the universe of responsibility.

Hell, even the unconscious yearnings of the UFOlogical mind make its definition as a history lesson obvious to those caught up in the examination.  Full Disclosure, the single most sought after goal of UFOlogy’s most fanatical adherents, is encompassed within the passive desire for its justification, the importance of its existence to those desiring enlightenment.  Full Disclosure will justify the daily yearnings and the wasted nights of true believers most noted for replacing knowledge with faith.  Government secrets will finally vindicate their pre-teen assessments of this tiny bit of galaxy we call home, and shrink the Universe to a manageable size and dimension.  The intolerable laughter of human peers will finally fade out like the end of a laugh track queued to the closing credits of our own cartoon episode of The Ghostbusters Meet Scooby Doo on parade.  In the words of Mike Good, a columnist for UFO Magazine, Disclosure “is our last hurrah, right before we UFO aficionados say, ‘I told you so’ to all of those friends and family who poked fun at us and called us weirdoes and finally become, in Nick Redfern’s words – sorry Nick, I’m paraphrasing here – completely redundant and irrelevant.”  Disclosure, in other words, is the justification of belief that has failed to provoke any meaningful response outside of ridicule.

Mike Good

The connotation here is oriented in terms usually reserved for religious enlightenment, which is important to understand, given that Disclosure possesses a fundamentally secular definition.  Disclosure is simply the admission by the United States government that the truth behind UFOs and flying saucers is a story of extraterrestrial influence worldwide that has been known and classified by the Department of Defense for the past 60-years.  In other words, Disclosure is the reinterpretation of history.  This whole argument of religious tone and human development is based on the insistence of a few that their interpretation of history is correct, and the history known to the rest of the world is wrong.  60-years of UFOlogical failure is reinterpreted as UFOlogical success when the U.S. government finally admits that all of the paranoid secrets emblazoned, tattooed, and then branded by UFOlogists onto the psyche of America is not the effect of the commonplace and unexceptional collection of variables that the great majority of evidence indicates it is, but is instead the extraordinary causal effects of alien creatures, alien cultures, and alien technology.

Disclosure states nothing definitive about human existence today.  It’s merely the reinterpretation of human history undertaken to prove that UFOlogists were not wrong about Roswell, Minot AFB, American nukes and UFOs, aliens at the Pentagon, and a hundred other non-events that were bought and sold years ago.  It is simply the United States government’s validation of UFO claims that it has always rejected.  Disclosure is the release of classified materials proving that UFOlogists were right and the rest of the world was wrong.  Unfortunately, because the rest of the world was not wrong, and because UFOlogy is all too often the refuge of liars, hoaxers, the mentally ill, the mentally deficient, the uneducated, and the easily convinced, and because the U.S. government doesn’t really care about UFOs or those who believe in them, such a Disclosure will never occur.  And if something akin to Disclosure does occur, the results of that singular examination of classified knowledge will never be accepted as complete or honest by those who expect the past 60-years of UFOlogical failure to be exonerated, and thereby redefined as UFOlogical success.  As Mike Good says, “Disclosure:  It is the Holy Grail.  It is the culmination of all those years of cogitating about UFOs.”  When that “Holy Grail” is nothing more than the realization that authoritative historians – or the revelation of new FOIA documents – do not meet the expectations of those lobbying for that new lease on their desires and beliefs, those who are so eagerly awaiting their view of that “Holy Grail” will need to look at themselves a little deeper – not their government.  After all, there is nothing more certain than the fact that these UFOlogists are no longer looking for UFOs – they’re just looking for people to tell them they were right about their interpretation of events that transpired 60-years ago, or 50-years ago, or 40-years ago, or yesterday.  They demand that their shattered beliefs be repaired by the rewriting of history, which is essentially all that Disclosure really is.  At its heart, it’s just another word to justify the whining that all too often accompanies failure.   

Disclosure – the Holy Grail of UFOlogy – will supposedly solve all of the problems that UFOlogy’s many frequent failures have made so plain to the rest of the world.  When the USAF discloses all it knows about UFOs, the flying saucers at Roswell will finally become historically significant instead of the collection of folk tales and comedy routines that it represents today.  Disclosure will finally turn Robert Hastings’ silly musings, distorted reports, impulsive and obsessive lies, and nonsensical syllogisms about technologies he is completely ignorant of into the attendant usurpation of military strategies designed to bring about a new age typified by a fact-based approach to nuclear power and weaponry.  It will rewrite Robert Salas’ complete and utter lies, redefining them as lessons taught to us by the more advanced and infinitely more understanding aliens with a mission to protect us from ourselves.  With the onset of Full Disclosure, the tale of man’s search for meaning within the wallets of his neighbors – an object lesson warning us of the pain that can follow mental illness and its toleration for unprovoked supposition – will turn into the unified redemption of Stanton Friedman’s numerous, evolving claims regarding our government’s response to the birth of alien intervention in man’s affairs.  That’s all Disclosure really is: assumed redemption.  Remember, please, and attend to that single definition.  Disclosure is primarily the redemption of those who are wrong, as collected within their irresponsible rewriting of human history.  It’s what happens when mankind uses witchcraft to turn its failed search for God into our successful encounter with the body politic.  For the most part, it is always used in reference to a future event, and as such, it can never actually occur (which is a blessing without disguise for those like Richard Dolan, Bryce Zabel, Robert M. Collins, Robert Hastings, H. R. Phillips, Robert Salas, Stephen Greer and many, many others who are currently selling it worldwide).  Disclosure is simply a means of making money by selling ideals and the byproducts of wishful thinking amidst the assurance that wrong is right. 

Di$clo$ure is a profit-motivated system designed to treat the psychic wounds of those who refuse to accept the promise that their futures will be ordinary.  It is intended to address the fractured impressions of UFOlogy left behind at the culmination of the USAF’s investigative apparatus, Project Blue Book, the decision to shut down that money pit having been reached upon the Department of Defense’s conclusion that there was nothing important, substantiated, or reasonable to investigate and no cause for the Pentagon to pretend otherwise.  You might keep that in mind the next time you see that your dreams of flying saucers, unprovoked aggression, and alien manipulations have also been dreamed by others, and that these others have added a price tag to the tail end of them in order to flag down your lapsing attention.  And the next time you read one of those revelation-promising tomes wherein the world is buggered once again by hoary-eyed mystics riding unpronounceable, viciously lucid machines far too close to your damp and hidden face for you to decide whether they truly exist in a time that dances to the music of matter or are merely a preface to those dreams you have yet to spill, you might remember for one quiet, brief moment the true character surrounding UFOlogy’s aggressive intent:  only the first hit is free.

**

Soon to debut at this fine venue:  SAUCERS OVER ALBUQUERQUE:  A FARCE IN THREE ACTS ; Paranoid and Delusional (being act 1)







December 29, 2011

By their works shall ye know them… [Part 4]


This is the fourth and final part of James Carlson’s epic exploration into the many and varied ramifications of the F.E. Warren AFB hoax and Ufology in general. A little later than promised, we are sure you will agree it was worth the wait!


 

Disclosure imageThe fascinating point that needs to be recognized here is not the fact that Robert Hastings and his like-minded fellow conspirators have concluded that their goals cannot be reliably established as an unrealized yet historical presence, an all-encompassing worldview, without the use of dishonest and false and abrasive, socially regressive tools developed for that singular purpose.  It is the fact that they are very clearly and insistently using as their starting point the assumption of full disclosure as already accomplished history – a history that the USAF, the Department of Defense, and the government of the United States very effectively dismissed and buried in 1969.  Taking into consideration the fact that the character of their mission is essentially one of westernized religious impulse, it becomes very clear that their goals necessitate the redefinition of Washington, DC as the New Rome, with the Pentagon representing the Colosseum, the Amphitheatrum Flavium, an inaugural symbol of Christian martyrdom, and the celebrated birthplace of Christianity’s own eventually triumphant worldview.  Not even this aspect of the foundations of belief that are being forged upon the emotive consciousness of a social psyche being manipulated by the strategic planting of lies is a very original concept, however.  Washington, DC as the New Rome is a powerful theme stressed within the same complex dynamics of social engineering in the numerous works of science fiction author Philip K. Dick.  The ascension of religious symbology and its subsequent influence on human belief is a common tool with historical relevance for those desiring to harness the commitment and energy of aggressive faith in order to make real their own desires.  More importantly, if the effects of religious impulse have taught the world anything, it is that idealists are most dangerous to those around them when they make the decision to forsake morality in order to ensure that their vision of history is the only one addressed to future generations.  In direct contrast to Hastings and his professional cohorts, most men of ethics simply find it abhorrent to withhold sufficient information to reach valid conclusions, and then tell you what you should believe and demand of others on the basis of that purposely instituted ignorance.  At its most primal level, it is this compulsion to control the opinions and motivations of others that drives men like Robert Hastings to assert such malignant hostility in pursuit of their own goals.

Paranoia imageThe true nature of their compulsion is obvious:  Hastings and his paranoid interests are trying to ignite a common, fearful demand for full disclosure; they have consciously elected to fill the minds of as many individuals as possible with fear and paranoia in regard to the unknown.  They are doing this for political reasons, having convinced themselves that full disclosure is an absolute necessity.  It is not.  It is merely an arbitrary goal born of religious impulse with the same type of emotive conviction behind it.  Although their faith that the results of this disclosure will make clear and establish for all time the existence of extraterrestrial interference on this planet we inhabit may be a conviction they refuse to discard, it is nonetheless misplaced.  It has failed to justify the single and restless burst of anger that followed the United States Air Force’s very general dismissal of UFO claims in 1969, just as it has failed to justify their self-serving belief that full disclosure will eventually negate all of their exhibited impotence and their inability to make concrete the willful, blanketed collusion of that belief and their faith.  They cannot establish the fruits of their claims by their own efforts and have convinced themselves that this failure is the fault of others; they are not to blame for their weaknesses, because the USAF and the Department of Defense have effectively hidden the truth from them, establishing thereby an occultic authority.  It isn’t even relevant that their failures are the result of their own acts and their inability to establish anything more substantial than rumor and innuendo and consistent failure to realize any genuine goals.  When examined from an objective point of view, they have nothing in the absence of conviction, and it is for that reason alone that they rely on subjective viewpoints based entirely on conviction, and nothing else.

The only other socially relevant human experience that can be described in this way is our very human reliance on religious impulse.  The aggressive instincts commonly raised by these issues are due to the mistaken yet resolute conviction that this is a discussion best suited for scientific assessment.  It is not.  There is no scientific assessment capable of resolving this issue for the same reason that there is no scientific assessment capable of resolving the issues raised in regard to beliefs establishing life after death or how best to approach the concept of immortality in a finite universe.  These UFO true believers have created from nothing an issue that relies almost entirely on antiauthoritarian developments and expressions raised throughout the 1960s and early 1970s and washed in the explosive anger, selfishness, and fiscal irresponsibility of the 1980s and 1990s.  It is a social movement that they have failed completely to validate or otherwise objectify for the rest of the world, and they are now reacting in the only way possible that will still enable them to believe in some measure of personal, scientific accomplishment.

(more…)







December 19, 2011

By their works shall ye know them… [Part 1]


Ramifications of the 2011 F.E. Warren AFB UFO Hoax

By James Carlson

 

At what point along the journey to create or influence convincing public concern does a community of those with common beliefs and similar goals as a result of that belief have to reach before individual members of that community begin to consider whether a more dishonest or deceptive approach might be necessary to satisfy those goals?  And what if the extent or the measure of this supposed necessity, as such individuals might imagine it, is a reflection of their personal belief that the failure to accomplish these goals may well endanger or at least setback for some indefinite period the potential growth and development – in a very real cosmic sense – of their own species?  As it turns out, it’s about 50 years… give or take a decade or so.  Being a question of morality, it would, of course, depend on the individual.  Being a question of morality, however, it’s not an indifferent question, and it should, for that reason, be explored a bit.

In June 2011, Robert Hastings, American chronicler of fables and folktales and currently the loudest and most self-promoting voice in UFO proponent communities world-wide, paid Reuters Newswire a nice sum to distribute a press release that he had authored, thereby borrowing the impression of the same high credibility that the network has labored at for decades in regard to its own work without actually having any more credibility than Hastings himself can muster on any given day – which isn’t very much.

The story Hastings wrote is entitled “Robert Hastings: Unidentified Aerial Object Sighted During October 2010 Nuclear Missile Incident”, a title typical of his vehement yet somewhat insipid self-promotion.  It supposedly establishes UFO interference with the now well-known incident of equipment failure that occurred on October 23, 2010, at F.E. Warren Air Force Base in Cheyenne, Wyoming.  During this incident, launch technicians temporarily lost the ability to communicate with 50 of its Minuteman III missiles. The five Missile Alert Facilities responsible for those ICBMs would have been unable to fire them during the period of the disruption, although airborne commanders would still have been able to fire the weapons at will.

The credibility that Robert Hastings paid for, while nonexistent in and of itself, has nonetheless been assumed by those in the UFO proponent communities on the basis of Reuters’ reputation alone.  After all, as Reuters’ advertising department is fond of noting, with some truth, we should add, “Thomas Reuters is the world’s leading source of intelligent information for business and professionals.”  It should be stressed, however, that the content of this article came from Hastings alone, and had nothing at all to do with Reuters Newswire reporting.  They merely released the story upon payment.  One only has to examine the numerous reprints of this article of Hastings’ throughout the internet to measure the worth of the borrowed (or paid for) credibility that has been associated with these claims as a result of his apparent marketing savvy.

At http://warlords2010.blogspot.com/2011/09/check-out-this-incredible-reuters-ufo.html, for instance, the first thing we note is that “It is a bit unusual to get a UFO story from the likes of Reuters but here is one such case.”  The author calls it “this incredible Reuters #UFO story”.  Reuters?  Well, they insisted that the article be printed only with the rider “Reuters is not responsible for the content in this press release.”  They were merely selling the distribution of Hastings’ article, not the content.

Huffington Post has published, to their credit, a much more detailed airing of the story at http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/07/07/ufos-at-nuclear-missile-site-eyewitnesses-afraid-to-talk_n_881802.html, but they also failed to examine the method itself that Robert Hastings has and continues to rely upon, a practice that allows him the freedom to invent whatever details he wants and call it “fact”.  It’s a freedom that has been allowed to take flight upon such airy and ill-imagined wings by other authors as well.

At http://earthstar.tripod.com/TSB_dir/2011/Radio0811.html, for example, Ray Larsen has also used this freedom to invent liberally, claiming that “a huge cigar-shaped craft was spotted by multiple witnesses, both civilian and military, hovering over the missile field and jamming communications with the missiles for 59 minutes.  The Air Force’s public face didn’t seem too upset about it, but some witnesses have reported receiving threats of severe penalties from their commanders for talking to reporters or researchers.”  It’s immediately notable that none of the above claims can be supported by anything at all aside from Hastings’ article, which pointedly fails to mention “multiple witnesses, both civilian and military” and merely implies (at best) that a UFO was “hovering over the missile field and jamming communications with the missiles”.  The rest of Larsen’s account in regard to Hastings “research” is equally devoid of anything that can actually be supported by more than the paranoia Hastings (and many others) are profiting from.  “I think the ETs, whoever they are, were close to ready for some form of contact, but now, I think they may be confused and have postponed their plans.  If they wanted to be a threat to this planet, I think they would have no problems in doing so, as their level of technology seems to still be beyond the understanding of our black budget scientists and engineers.”

Apparently the ETs aren’t the only ones who are confused…

It’s not the first time that Robert Hastings has performed this little con on the internet.  He did the same thing in the days leading up to his much (and very properly) ridiculed press conference of September 27, 2010.

At http://flyingflashlight.com/tag/robert-hastings/, for instance, we learned that “A major news organization says flying saucers are toying with American nuclear weapons, but you better read the byline and ‘article’”.  This author looked a little closer, and hats off to him:  “I am suspecting an automatic feed from PR Newswire to Reuters.com has created this most alarming of headlines to be prominently displayed on the organization’s home page (it’s the No. 2 most-popular article): U.S. Nuclear Weapons Have Been Compromised by Unidentified Aerial Objects.

“If you stopped right there and didn’t read any further, you would fail to discover that this piece of information being presented as an ‘article’ is actually a paid-for advertisement (oh, I mean ‘press release’) for an upcoming news media conference of ex-military members who plan to discuss their experiences with unidentified flying objects.”

At http://www.facebook.com/lesliekean/posts/143133802389746, author Leslie Kean (who should know better and who will be discussed in more detail later for that very reason) notifies us that “Reuters has posted the press release about the upcoming press conference on U.S. nuclear weapons being compromised by unidentified aerial objects, organized by Robert Hastings and Robert Salas, on Sept. 27th in Washington. The media needs to be alerted about this.”  Yes, I’m certain the media felt the same way immediately following that little rape of the truth.  The Washington Post reporter who attended that pathetic little example of Scrappy-doo show-boating was quite clear that the only thing of value he could find were the cookies that were made available to the press.  Those who watched the DVD that Salas and Hastings were trying to sell immediately afterwards didn’t even get that.  It’s a shame they couldn’t at least have included a coupon for 25 cents off a package of Toll House chocolate chip cookies, but these entrepreneurs simply aren’t the type to plan so far in advance.  Proof of this can be verified from any summary of losses incurred from their DVD sales of the event when potential customers discovered almost immediately that they could watch the conference on CNN for free, an unfortunate development when profiteers fail to weigh the future out-of-pocket costs to their budding business portfolio when the event they’ve planned in such detail so far in advance is freely open to all press and media representatives who might also wish to attend.  Not that it matters much; they’ll likely recoup their losses when the movie version is finally released, unless they do something completely boneheaded like bar any use of Muppets ® technology.  That’s not a joke either – those Muppets ® can turn almost any silly idea into a blockbuster summer release, if you give them a little lead time.

At http://roblorinov.wordpress.com/2011/06/25/robert-hastings-unidentified-aerial-object-sighted-during-october-2010-nuclear-missile-incident-reuters/, we read “Amazing that Reuters is reporting this as the major mainstream media do not usually report UFO activity.  What is reported in this story is NOT the first time a US missile system has been rendered nonfunctional while a UFO is in the area.”  Of course, this particular claim hasn’t been examined by the writer of the piece – he’s assuming that Hastings is telling the truth both here and in his book UFOs and Nukes, which purports to catalogue such events.  As a result, the writer’s assumption that the incident “is NOT the first time a US missile system has been rendered nonfunctional while a UFO is in the area” is based on nothing, certainly not Reuter’s credibility, which in this case has been bought and paid for by Robert Hastings as a way to establish credibility that he’s failed to establish with his writings alone.  It’s just more unconscious disinformation by people who are otherwise unable to back up their claims with anything more than “Hastings says it’s true.”  The writer of the article isn’t necessarily lying; he simply believes the claims of a charlatan and a fraud who is creating this belief for reasons of his own, reasons having nothing at all to do with an accurate accounting of the “incidents” he and others are associating with UFOs – incidents that simply cannot be substantiated by any jury outside of the imagination they’ve liberally applied to the subject at hand.

It isn’t the first time that Robert Hastings has attempted to make such claims.  In relation to a case of numerous missile failures that occurred in March 1967 at Malmstrom AFB, he attempted the same type of deception.  Fortunately for anybody insisting upon a measure of valid evidence, a true accounting of testimony, or a determined and faithfully assessed credibility in regard to that testimony, the witnesses he has used to establish these claims have insisted very clearly that he was lying and denounced entirely any interference, reporting, or investigation resulting from any UFO incident Robert Hastings or Robert Salas have proposed.  Both are merely being deceptive, a fact that was easily proven once the “witnesses” were reinterviewed by individuals with a more ethical concern for the truth than any possessed by these two UFOlogical frauds.

It should be pointed out, however, that Robert Hastings learned something very important from the subsequent and embarrassing exposé of his methods.  He learned that his “witnesses” can be tracked down and reinterviewed, at which point the truth can be made known.  And when the weak link in your claims happens to be inherent to your use of non-witness witnesses capped by an inability to properly interpret what testimony has been presented, the best recourse – for those wishing to continue with the presentation of such false claims – is to prevent others from gaining access to your witnesses, thereby removing any embarrassing revelations that might come about subsequent to the lie.  It should come as no surprise, therefore, that this is exactly what Robert Hastings has now done.  He purchased the apparently marketable commodity of credibility held by Reuters as a result of their own fine and professional conduct, because he knew that credibility would be necessary in order to freely assert another hoax regarding UFOs and nuclear missile failures.  He then followed up this sad little attempt at reputation repair by essentially taking the weak link represented by the witnesses and their testimony completely out of the equation.  That’s right, folks:  Robert Hastings went anonymous…

By adapting the witness to the lie, Hastings was able to rediscover for himself the Great Lesson of fashionable con-artists worldwide, from P.T. Barnum through a long line of hidden personalities trying to sell crack outside of Narcotics Anonymous meetings:  surprise! anonymity can protect not only his witnesses from being questioned about those little details that Robert Hastings invented out of nothing – tossing ‘em in just as the story starts to gel around the public’s perception with a slick panache guaranteed by addled, nameless used-car salesmen everywhere to make the story sound a little better than anything you’ve got in your pocket right now – but can also prevent the sad-eyed teamster leaning against the telephone pole downstairs from picking up the common knowledge of Hastings’ own fraudulent activities and exposing them to the Greek hooker on the stairway who doesn’t even give a damn about UFOs, and just wants a little iced tea and lemonade in a clean glass by the time The Simpsons come on.  It’s another one of those ageless “I can create an indefinable wall between me and those skeptical critics by inventing a witness, but keeping everything about him a secret” type of lessons.  This type of deception, however, requires a little extra on the other side of the equation, making the weight of established credibility of the sort Reuters has turned into a marketable commodity a great and necessary benefit when it’s associated by no fault of their own with attempts to use imaginary witnesses to establish a point of view that’s so essentially separate and unassociated with the author’s – this, of course, being Robert Hastings.

Hastings’ article not only makes this anonymity very clear, but emphasizes as well the use that only he is willing to put it to:

Regarding the recent situation at F.E. Warren AFB, Hastings emphasizes, “My sources have not said that the UFO sighted during the October 23, 2010 missile-communications disruption actually caused it. And it must be noted that the Air Force’s Global Strike Command has officially attributed the problem to an improperly-replaced circuit card in a weapons-system processor.”

 He adds, “Nevertheless, the intermittent presence of a huge, cigar-shaped aerial craft during the hours-long –- not minutes-long –- crisis was definitely noted and remarked upon by various technical teams working in the base’s missile field.”

And that’s how you take a lie and turn it into something all brand new and sparkly, like a box full of stars tossed up into the heavens.  It’s a shame these witnesses have refused to come forward, if they even exist at all.  In firm recognition of the dire importance Robert Hastings has placed on this issue of anonymity, without once focusing on the fact that he has again struck the hammer against the steel, sparks flying like tiny little abrasions in the wind, and has repeated old sins by making a number of spurious, pointless and fact-free claims without presenting anything at all in the way of validated evidence to back it up, that last supposition absolutely must be properly addressed.  The creation of such alleged witnesses, after all, encompasses an implied deception that many people – who are very willing to come forward – are quite certain that Hastings is more than capable of.  It also fits in very well with any collation of his past failures to build a case in the absence of the tools and materials necessary to do so honestly.  The facts of his past deceptions alone would establish quite handily his moral capabilities for such a strategy.  The ease with which his claims can be shattered, in many cases by simply analyzing his work for elements that cannot be reconciled with any of the internal conflicts typical of the military environment he limits himself to, and yet refuses to learn anything about, tends to support his capability for invention far more than his ability to uncover hidden facts that the rest of the world has failed – for whatever reasons – to notice.  Where anonymity describes the source, as it does here, Robert Hastings can say absolutely anything he likes.  The sad truth is, he’s done it before; invention is, after all, his forté.

The suspicions raised by the assumed anonymity of his only witnesses must to be examined if we’re to consider any of these recent claims credible at all, particularly when any attempts to confirm such claims – this search for confirmation beginning shortly after he broke this “big” story – instantly produce literally dozens of insistent, disgusted affirmations that there was no UFO in fact or rumor, nor was a UFO reported or investigated.  Most members of the military are justifiably proud of their accomplishments and their service, so when someone like Robert Hastings – who never served in the military – assumes the arrogance necessary to redefine those accomplishments and that service, doing so by trivializing their contributions to national defense, they generally respond with understandable anger and rancor, something that Hastings has never acknowledged, preferring by far to use unsustained anecdotes to establish a case that simply can’t be made honestly.  Anonymity must, therefore, be examined in accordance with its purpose – this purpose being the creation of a myth.

Part Two follows tomorrow.



Filed under: UFOlogy,Ufology History,UFOs — Tags: , , , — James Carlson @ 12:25 pm




July 27, 2011

Famous Black Triangle UFO A Fake


The mystery of the iconic Petit-Rechain black triangle UFO photo has finally been solved. The photographer, a man named only as Patrick, has admitted making the UFO out of polystyrene in an interview with mainstream Belgian TV channel RTL-TVI.

The photograph was taken 21 years ago in 1990 at the height of the Belgian UFO flap and was an instant hit around the world, with many publications using the photo as a kind of banner for the UFO phenomenon.

It was known as the Petit-Rechain photo after the Belgian town where it was photographed, but Patrick revealed he and some friends made the model in a short space of time before photographing it some hours later that evening.

Patrick said “You can do a lot with a little, we managed to trick everyone with a piece of polystyrene” and he is right. The photograph has kept “experts” busy for years, with many of a ufological persuasion using this as proof of alien visitation.

“We made the model with polystyrene, we painted it and then we started sticking things to it, then we suspended it in the air … then we took the photo,”

The prank was originally meant to fool some work colleagues at the small business where Patrick worked as a fitter, but quickly went global soon after leaving the walls of the factory.

Patrick assumed their deception would be discovered, and takes pride in the fact that it never was.  He apologised for fooling so many believers, but clearly got a lot of laughs out of the whole thing after admitting he wouldn’t hesitate to do it all over again.

In actual fact, Patrick is incorrect when he thinks the deception was never discovered, because the exact method of how he did it was revealed as recently as March of this year in Tim Printy’s (excellent) SUNlite magazine, Volume 3 Number 2.

On pages 19-22 there is an in-depth analysis by Roger Paquay which deconstructs various arguments presented by experts on the believer side of the fence, while presenting readers with the most likely explanation of what the image actually is.

“The various analyses cannot exclude effects based on a cardboard triangle suspended by a thin thread, giving the rotation effect seen on the picture.”

“This behavior doesn’t agree with an observation of an exotic object. The more likely conclusion is in favor of a fake made to illustrate the observation of a plane or to match with the description of the “Triangular UFO” found in the media for the previous four months.”

“It is very curious that, in a such a highly populated area, with people looking for UFOs, nobody else reported seeing this large object at low altitude. Only the photographer could explain what is really on his picture but his desire to remain anonymous will prevent any further resolution on the issue.”

Substitute cardboard for polystyrene and I would say he got it spot on!



Filed under: Ufology History,UFOs — Tags: , , , — Stephen Broadbent @ 11:11 pm




June 23, 2009

The Morristown UFO Hoax Exposes Problems With Ufology


flares In the process of our research here at RealityUncovered, while investigators are currently centrally focused on the MJ-12 mythology that has permeated through Ufology for so many years – we also come across some truly unusual stories. The Morristown UFO incident is certainly one of the strangest hoaxes to come out of Ufology in a very long time. It’s strange because, this time, it was conducted by two skeptics who believe in the need to expose pseudoscience.

The Morristown, N.J. UFO Hoax

In an odd twist on UFO hoaxes, this one was conducted by skeptics Joe Rudy and Chris Russo who wanted to conduct a typical UFO hoax in order to portray, in a very public way, how easily people are fooled by such things. Reading this story brought to mind a conversation Steve and I had about a year ago in the midst of our own investigations. 

One late night, after reading some of the silly frantic comments about the "Caret Drone" at a particular forum called "Open Minds" (one of many tiny UFO believer-forums that’s always crawling with brainless nimwits ready to believe the next big hoax) – I said to Steve, "Why are hoaxers so stupid about creating these stories – they give themselves away, leaving clues and evidence strewn all about for any decent researcher to discover?"

Steve’s response was a short quip, typical of his personality that combines a matter-of-fact approach with biting British sarcasm. "Because there aren’t any decent researchers in Ufology."

"Do you realize that based on what we know about this scam (MJ-12), and the mistakes they made – we could create a hoax a hundred times more effective and impossible to trace?"

"Yup," he responded.

"Why the hell are the hoaxers so stupid?"

"Because they’re used to dealing with brainless believers who never bother checking anything out," he answered.

And that’s the truth.

balloon_release Using fishing line, helium baloons and flares, Joe and Chris conducted one of the most elaborate UFO hoaxes of the last few years. They produced UFO sightings several times, and each time the media coverage was huge – even the History Channel’s UFO Hunters and Bill Birnes of UFO Magazine covered the "Morristown UFO." Bill Birnes in particular was revealed for his lack of critical thinking in this case. They were never caught – but eventually revealed themselves on an online eSkeptic website.

If You’re Gonna Hoax – You’re Gonna Get Yours Too

There is a reason RU has never taken the tactic of using public hoaxes as a way to expose hoaxes. In one case we turned MJ-12 scammers "anonymous" identity tactics against the hoaxers themselves by using an anonymous online entity named "Tacitus" to smoke out the con artists through their frantic, panicked reactions – but as an organization that stands firmly against hoaxing, creating a hoax directed toward the public would be counterproductive. If you fight hard so that hoaxers are revealed and prosecuted, you’d be shooting yourself in the foot by adding to the list of hoaxes already so prevalent in the field.

Joe and Chris eventually faced disorderly conduct charges by the Morris County prosecutor for presenting a "threat to aviation" with their stunt. Should they face those charges? Everyone has a different opinion. But regardless of how you feel about the actions of these two guys, they did successfully reveal a very important aspect of the UFO phenomenon and public reaction to sightings.

That revelation is that most journalists seem incapable of properly investigating witness claims or thinking critically about UFO sightings at all, and most UFO "investigators" have their heads shoved so far up their own particular belief system that they can’t see the forest for the trees.

What’s your opinion about the Morristown UFO duo – did they ultimately achieve what they set out to prove? Offer your feedback in the comments section below.



Filed under: UFOlogy,UFOs — Tags: , , , — RyanDube @ 2:16 pm






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